Maternity Pictures!

Over Thanksgiving weekend David and I took maternity pictures and I am so thrilled with how they turned out, I just have to share. We took them in my parent’s beautiful backyard; it was a fun, special time to focus on our baby girl and her upcoming arrival.

Our amazing photographer, Stephen Cavecche, just happens to be my younger brother, but we would hire him again and again for our photography needs even if he wasn’t family ;). If you like what you see, check out his website at http://www.stephencphoto.com/.


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Photographer: Stephen Cavecche Photography
Location: Private Residence
Dress: Pink Blush Maternity

For Such a Time as This: Thoughts on our Baby Girl

“Who knows if perhaps you were made queen for just such a time as this?” Esther 4:14b

It has been nearly eight weeks since David and I found out our January baby is a sweet little girl, and I am way overdue to get my thoughts down about this big news!

Both of Baby Kberg’s grandmas came up for the big reveal and were in the ultrasound room when the tech said “three little lines… it’s a GIRL!!” Tears and very loud squeals ensued; and I spent the next several days looking and David and saying “I can’t believe we’re having a girl” over and over. Thrilled didn’t even begin to describe how we were feeling; it still doesn’t.

its-a-girlIt’s a girl! Back when my bump was tiny.

Confession time: I didn’t tell anyone, but I was convinced Baby Kberg was a boy. I don’t know why, I just had a feeling. I was looking forward to being a “boy mom” and everything that comes with raising a son, but when I heard “girl” my heart instantly melted. I know she is exactly who is supposed to join our family at this time.

This season of pregnancy has been very bittersweet, characterized by both extreme excitement and significant loss. Over the summer, two women very dear to me passed away within two months of each other. Sharon Runner and Judy Ball were incredible women of God who each mentored me in multiple ways, encouraging me in my faith, marriage, missions, career and womanhood. They loved so much bigger than themselves, and through a lifetime of service to others left a lasting impression on so many people.

About a week before we found out Baby Kberg’s gender, I tearfully confessed to David that part of me hoped we had a girl coming. Losing Sharon and Judy back to back was a significant blow. The world desperately needs good women and two of its best are now in heaven. I told David I loved the idea of raising a little girl to be a strong, faithful woman who could help carry on the legacy these women left behind.

The Lord knew what the events of this summer would be before we were even pregnant with Baby Kberg. He knew exactly what our lives would look like, and exactly who would fit into these circumstances. Our sweet baby girl is the answer to so many prayers, someone truly designed “for such a time as this.” I can’t wait to meet her!

This is Pregnancy

This post is dedicated to all the amazing women who were real with me about what I was getting myself into. You are my heroes. Seriously.

Now that our pregnancy is public, the number one question I am (understandably) asked is “How are you feeling?” And honestly, now that I’m in my second trimester, I’m feeling pretty good! But the first trimester… that was an entirely different story.

I made a promise to myself during fertility treatments that I when I became pregnant I would not complain about my symptoms, no matter how bad they were. I know all too well that many women would sacrifice just about anything for the blessing of being able to carry a child. In honor of them, and my own journey, I have been determined to ride out the difficult parts of pregnancy with positivity and grace.

However, in some situations, there is nothing wrong with telling it like it is. So ladies (or gentlemen who happen to be reading this), in the spirit of encouragement and camaraderie let me tell you, pregnancy is not all sunshine and rainbows.

Lest you be fooled by what I like to call the “perfect preggo” whose pictures we often see floating around Instagram, let me give you a small glimpse of what my first three months were like.

Parks and Rec

My workout routine was the first thing to go, followed closely by my ability to eat anything that remotely resembled healthy food. I didn’t do my hair or wear make-up. Ever. Attempting to shower on a somewhat regular basis and put on clean, matching clothes became a monumental task; as did driving, walking, running errands, doing housework, talking to people, and showing up for work on time. If I was fully clothed, smelling alright, and not throwing up it was a good day.

Insane nausea and fatigue ruled all. Pre-pregnancy Kendra harshly judged pregnant Kendra on a daily basis, but sick and tired pregnant Kendra could have cared less.

There is one incident in particular that I think perfectly captures the “glamour” of this stage. SPOILER ALERT: If you don’t like reading stories that involve throw up, stop now. You have been warned.

One morning smack dab in the middle of my first trimester, David was getting ready for work and therefore occupying our only bathroom. I was in the middle of my own morning routine: lying in bed taking deep breaths while waiting for my anti-nausea medicine to take effect. (Can I get an “amen” for Zofran?) Delaney, our unsuspecting bulldog, was sleeping on her bed in our room.

All of a sudden, a swift and fierce wave of nausea hit; unfortunately this was going to be a day where Zofran did mercifully little to control my symptoms. I jumped out of bed and sprinted towards the closed door of our bathroom. Delaney, thinking this was a signal to play, ran ahead of me and jumped up on the front of my legs. The epic nausea, closed bathroom door, and bulldog delay were the perfect storm. I lost it. EVERYWHERE. Right there in my hallway.

Delaney fled to safety and poor David opened the door a second later to find me kneeling in a gigantic mess, still very much in the middle of getting sick. He gently ushered me into the bathroom and began cleaning up. A couple minutes later, while I was still huddled over the toilet, I heard him say “Aw, bulldog, she got you too.”

You guys, I threw up on my dog. This is pregnancy.

Granted, I have had a harder introduction to pregnancy than a lot of women. I know my “morning” (read: all day) sickness was on the severe end of the scale. I even ended up in the hospital for fluids after an extremely bad bought of nausea left me dangerously dehydrated.

So, if you are reading this and have not experienced pregnancy for yourself, don’t let me scare you. I just want to provide a little levity and encouragement so you don’t feel bad if you don’t live up to the myth of the woman with an easy breezy pregnancy. One day you can say to yourself, “at least I didn’t throw up on my dog like that one chick.”

And if you happen to be one of those aforementioned “perfect preggos” then more power to you! Please, share your secrets with the rest of us.

Blown Away

To say I am blown away by the response to my first venture into the blogging world is an understatement.

It has been such a blessing to read everyone’s responses, and I have especially enjoyed the conversations it has spurred with other women who have either beat infertility themselves, or are in the middle of their journey. I’ve also heard from many men and women who didn’t realize infertility was such a common issue but were intrigued by our story. Thank you for taking the time to read what I had to say. The hope of having these conversations is exactly why I decided to open up. I am humbled, and honestly could not ask for anything more.

I’m still not 100% sure what I am going to use this little blog for. I started it because, due to some current and upcoming life changes, I know I will need a new outlet for my writing. I also hope to use it as a way to keep loved ones who live far away updated on our life and family in a more in-depth way than Facebook and Instagram. However, I am also open to using it for a lot more, and I would love to hear your thoughts!

I am by no means an expert on fertility issues, and there are many aspects of infertility my husband and I did not have to face. But, I found the conversations that came out of my initial post so encouraging that I am considering writing a few posts that delve into the specifics of what we experienced.

So, if anyone out there is interested in the type of testing we went through, hearing more about things like the dreaded HSG, or even laughing at awkward moments in our treatment, please let me know!

There were many times throughout our process that I turned to Google and the blogs of women I sometimes didn’t even know for information, and they brought me a lot of comfort and real-world knowledge. I would love the opportunity to provide that reassurance to others.

What you don’t see in the Cute Pregnancy Announcement

Two pink lines. One much fainter than the other, but there were undeniably two lines.

I will never forget that moment standing in our tiny bathroom. I held the home pregnancy test up to my husband and we stared at each other in disbelief. Over the next couple of days four more home pregnancy tests (what can I say? I was excited!) and two blood tests would confirm it: we were pregnant!

We excitedly began brainstorming creative ways to tell our family and, of course, how to share it on Social Media. Even more important than the cute announcement picture, I knew we needed to open up about our journey to pregnancy.

From what we see in the media and on Facebook, getting pregnant seems simple, fun, and easy; but one in eight couples struggle with infertility. We learned we were part of that one in eight shortly after we began trying to conceive.

I always had an inkling in the back of my mind that getting pregnant might be more difficult than I wanted it to be, but nothing quite prepares you for the rush of emotions that hit when a doctor tells you there is something wrong and you won’t be able to do it on your own.

As a woman, I felt completely betrayed by my body. We are told that God created us with the amazing, unique ability to grow and create life; it’s something to be proud of and something to cherish. Then one day you find out that your body has a hard time with that God-given purpose. Modern medicine, miracles, and “God’s perfect timing” aside, I just wanted my body to work.

As a couple, we not only had to face the reality that our dream of a family would take longer to accomplish, we had to prepare for a litany of medical appointments and tests. We had to answer difficult questions and be open about a very private, intimate part of our relationship; often to doctors we had just met.

The Lord redeems all things for good, and I would not change a single thing about our story. David and I saw our relationship stretch and grow in incredible ways, and we felt bolstered by a wonderful support system of family and friends. There are blessings in every circumstance. I don’t share our story to complain or make anyone feel sorry for us, but to try to bring awareness to an issue that is very common but often not discussed.

I want to give hope to the woman scrolling through Facebook who cries at yet another pregnancy announcement, or comfort to the couple who want children more than anything, but it’s just not happening how they envisioned. I understand you, I feel your pain, I will never tell you that your current struggle will make your future kids “that much more precious,” and I hope by sharing our story, I can make your journey a little less taboo.

The road to pregnancy looks different for everyone. Our road included eight months of trying, a litany of blood tests and invasive exams, countless doctors’ appointments, a lot of money spent, an initial diagnosis of Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, and a re-diagnosis of Chronic Anovulation which culminated in a round of Clomid and ultimately getting pregnant with our current little love.

We need to respect the differences in our stories; one size does not fit all and that’s beautiful. It is my hope that we can talk more freely about the story behind the cute announcement picture and celebrate those stories with genuine joy.